


Art Imitates Life

by the_many_splendored



Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: But Not Much, Gen, Lucy and Toby know when to just shut up and listen, Metafiction, slight RPF, when eight creative people butt heads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:33:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27385747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_many_splendored/pseuds/the_many_splendored
Summary: Lucy and Toby's pitch to the Queens about the musical descends into chaos.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 30





	Art Imitates Life

**Author's Note:**

> I really enjoy the fandom's idea that "in-universe", the Queens were the main creative force behind getting Six up and running after they returned to life. With that in mind, I figured that even though the competition itself is a sham, that doesn't mean that the girls didn't have some old tensions and resentments flare up. As such, I figured that in this timeline, the "Queens Fight" scene that showed up in the show would be based on a real conversation that might have happened during the development of the play.

“So, just making sure I understand,” Catherine said, addressing Toby and Lucy and the other queens sitting around the table in her kitchen, “the structure we have for the show is that we’re having the competition for leading lady based on whose life Henry ruined the most, but at the end, it’s all revealed it’s a big joke?”

“That’s what we had in mind, but it’s still your show,” Lucy said – she and Toby were sitting to the left side, with Anna between them and the Spanish queen; Cathy Parr was sitting at the far end of the table. “That’s why we’re recording this, so that we don’t forget anyone’s ideas.” She gave her digital recorder a little shake to remind everyone of where the device was.

Kitty Howard piped up from the right side of the table, where she, Jane and Anne were huddled in close confidence. “I like it!” she said. “We’ve all written great songs, so this way we can still show our chops, yeah? Besides,” and here, she shrugged in a casual way. “If it _were_ a competition, it wouldn’t be fair anyway – I’d win by a landslide.”

The silence around the table was deafening, and Kitty looked genuinely confused. “What?”

“You really think you’d be the winner?” Jane asked, with no real malice in her voice. “How can you be so sure? I mean, if it’s a question of “how heart-wrenching is your performance”, almost all of us besides Anna could have a fair shot – no offense, dear,” she said to Anna, who waved it off.

“Are…are you making fun of me?” Kitty asked, her expression incredulous. “My song’s the longest in the score and I didn’t even get to grow up! I can think of four good reasons I would win, and their names are Mannox, Dereham, Tudor, and Culpeper!”

Anne rolled her eyes. “Cuz, you can’t base it on how much you were manipulated! In case you forgot, I got treated like a chess piece too, and yeah, it was just by my dad, but it wasn’t any picnic for me either!”

Lucy leaned over and whispered to Toby, “Should we say something?”

He shook his head. “I think they need to have this out.”

Sure enough, before he even finished his sentence, Catherine cut in, “But that’s only one instance, Anne! I’m with Kitty, a lifetime worth of manipulation from outside men is going to warp your life no matter what – I mean, look at me! I got shipped here to England at 16, not knowing the language _at all_ , and I was expected to marry some random royal!”

Anna snorted in genuine laughter. “Well, at least you’re not alone in that one, Catherine! I still wonder what would have happened if I _had_ known some English before coming over from Cleves; at least I would have known what Henry was trying to pull with that “beggar in disguise” stunt.”

Catherine’s expression softened a little – Anna’s laugh was always warm and inviting – but her voice was still hard. “Okay, and that’s an entirely fair comparison. I guess it just stings that after 24 years, annulment or no annulment, Henry didn’t even have the decency to say goodbye! I gave him the best years of my life!” There were true tears starting to prick at the edge of her eyes.

Anne turned and looked at her cousin. “Gee, Kitty, isn’t it funny – Henry didn’t say goodbye to either of us, did he?”

“Why no, he didn’t,” Kitty said sarcastically. “Oh yeah, Catherine, I notice you don’t have one of these.” She moved her ponytail out of the way, showing the scar from where she’d been beheaded. “Not really comparable, is it?” Anne patted her shoulder supportively, and the movement revealed her own scar.

“Okay, yes, that’s true,” Catherine admitted. “It just proves what a withholding creep Henry was in every way – OH! Here’s another example! My little Mary had the worst fever when she was about three, right, and of course back in the day, that could be a death sentence, and Henry wouldn’t let me sit with her to offer some comfort, I mean, what kind-”

No one seemed to notice that Jane had been gripping the table edge tighter and tighter, so everyone jumped when she almost shouted, “Are you KIDDING me?”

“Jane,” Cathy Parr asked in a soothing voice, “Are you all right?”

“No, I’m damn well not!” Jane hissed. “For pity’s sake, Catherine, at least you could see Mary grow up! I never even got to hold Edward once!”

“GUYS, I have the plague!” Anna shouted. The others turned to her in concern, and when she saw how scared they looked, she said, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m fine, I just thought it might break the tension.” The others muttered, but Jane did offer the other woman a small smile. “It’s like Jane says, I know _I_ wouldn’t win anything, I’m doing just fine…though to be fair, the humiliation of being rejected _did_ follow me around the whole Continent for a few years.”

Anne snorted. “We all had a dose of international humiliation, don’t you think?”

“That dose was different for all of us, ANNE.” Catherine retorted. “Henry had at least three mistresses while I was queen, and who knows how many casual affairs he had? Can’t get more embarrassing than that!”

At this point, Anne stood up from the table and got in Catherine’s face. “Mistresses is one thing, but at least you had Mary to comfort you! I had three miscarriages before Elizabeth was even born!”

“Oh, don’t even start with me on _that_ , I had five!” Catherine yelled – and the table erupted in chaos. No punches were thrown, but everyone was on their feet, and the curses that were flying around between Anne, Catherine, Jane and Kitty were enough to make Toby and Lucy blush. Anna at first seemed to find it funny, but when she and Cathy saw Jane pull Kitty’s hair to make the younger girl sit down, that’s when it had to stop.

“ENOUGH!” Cathy yelled, and everyone shut up. “Girls, are we actually doing this? REALLY?”

The room was quiet for a second – and then Toby and Lucy burst into laughter. “What’s so funny?” Cathy asked.

“It’s just-“ Lucy wheezed as she tried to catch her breath – “We’ve been struggling to find a good transition between Kitty’s song and yours, and you all basically just wrote it for us!” The room erupted into giggles as everyone got the joke, and the rest of the meeting was infinitely more productive.


End file.
